hard pill to swallow
*This sat in my drafts since November 2018. I never posted it, and you’ll understand why.*
I hold back in many facets of my life. I have strong beliefs about women’s rights, animal rights, the environment.
But I’ve seen what feminists - what everyone now calls “feminazis” - are labeled as. I’ve seen the shitstorm that is the modern-day gender war, a war that was never meant to begin in the first place. I’ve seen the reactions of my friends and family as I’ve navigated my own morality as a vegetarian. Some reactions are of support, but most are of condescension, apathy, and a total lack of understanding. On the whole, people around me seem disgruntled that I make the choices that I do, choices that align with my value system. I want to speak about them, but based on what I’ve seen in the media and in everyday dialogue about these topics, I feel that I need to cover my emotions behind a mask of indifference. I don’t like the idea of anyone shoving their beliefs down others’ throats. I think that’s wrong. But I think if you have a message to relay, you need to deliver it in a way that makes people want to listen.
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The truth is I’m a feminist. I’m a vegetarian. I care about the environment. These subjects are all such hot buttons. They’ve been politicized. When I’ve gone on dates and the inevitable question arises about my meatless food choices, my visceral reaction is to shy away from the answer. I’m so accustomed to backlash that I immediately put up a defence, hoping to not engage any further. I’ve been asked “you’re not one of those crazy feminists are you” more than once without provocation. It seems like if I have an opinion on anything important, I need to walk on eggshells for the sake of other people’s egos. So in that light, I’m going to dispel some common notions about these subjects.
I’m a feminist, but that means I believe in equal rights for women and men. I don’t hate men. In fact I think men face a lot of their own deep-rooted issues that are not often spoken about. I also think men have the privilege of power and should use it to help others who don’t possess said power. I don’t necessarily blame anyone for gender inequality. It is embedded in human society and is a difficult and tedious issue to unravel. It’s the same with racism. Most of us are subconsciously racist. That stems from the lack of understanding of people who appear different than us.
The #metoo and #timesup movements are widely controversial. I think it’s been a long time coming that men who abuse their power pay the price. However I also think there are varying degrees of sexual assault, and depending on that degree, not everyone deserves to have their life ruined. Don’t even get me started on cancel culture — yes, in some instances it is deserved. But not all. Here’s an unpopular opinion: when it comes to sexual assault, I believe both genders are capable of lying. I’ve seen this happen firsthand, my jaw on the floor when I found out the truth. The more people lie, the more those who tell the truth are discredited. It is an unfortunate and disgusting flip side of the coin. I don’t know the solution — nobody does. This has given rise to the present day gender war. Who do we believe? How do we rule in favour of those who have been marginalized for so long, without compromising on equality and justice?
I’m vegetarian, leaning vegan. I’ve yet to cut some animal byproducts from my diet. I loathe speaking about it. I know there are people out there who will brand me as “extreme" if I do. I’ve already been branded as such by friends and romantic partners without doing anything other than stating my honest opinion. But taking into account the recent UN report on the global warming crisis fast approaching us, I feel it necessary to delve into my reasons for being vegetarian, both moral and environmental.
Ever since I was a young girl, I’ve been an animal lover to my core. The idea of an animal being hurt to serve us has always disturbed me. What disturbed me even more was the fact that while I loved animals, I was also eating animals. I was a hypocrite. It seemed so absurd to have a companion animal sleeping next to me by night, while I ate a similar animal by day. Conditioning is a powerful thing; we are conditioned to see this as normal.
I’ve heard every argument imaginable against veganism. I frequently read the comment sections on my favourite activists’ posts. I hear the jokes made about “crazy vegans”. I’m reminded almost daily about meat being needed as part of a “healthy diet”, about human history of hunting and eating meat to survive, about “protein deficiencies” should you cut it out of your diet. But all of these arguments pale in comparison to knowing that my food choices have no victim. On top of that, cutting out or cutting down on meat helps the planet, which at this point we all know. The fact of the matter is, we are humans, all 7 billion of us living in the 21st century, not 8,000 B.C.E. In first world countries, we live in a time where it is possible to lead a healthy lifestyle without meat. There are other sources of protein that are readily available to us, with more options appearing in the market every day. And quite frankly, I do not respect choices that involve a tortured victim. I respect you as a human, living in a conditioned society. But I do not respect that choice. We do have a choice. I grew up eating meat, and that’s all I lived on. I used to get angry because I knew deep down that my actions were not in line with my moral compass. Once I accepted the fact that I was paying people to slit the throats of animals for no reason outside of me wanting to stay comfortable, lazy, and selfish, I stopped. It took some trial and error, self-education, and time, but I stopped. And I am not protein deficient; in fact, I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been.
Not only that, I refuse to support an industry that is the leading contributor of climate change. Livestock (namely cows) and their byproducts produce methane gas. This greenhouse gas emission warms the Earth twenty times faster than carbon dioxide. As the world population increases, the demand for meat increases, and so does the amount of animal agriculture needed to fulfill this demand. If you reduce the amount of methane emissions, the level in the atmosphere goes down within decades, as opposed to reducing C02, where you don’t see the result for at least a century.
I wrote this post because I want to be clear on my values with you: my readers! I want you to get to know me better, understand what drives me, and maybe even see things from a different point of view than your own. I also want to encourage open, non-aggressive discussions about these topics, because the way it is talked about in the media and online right now is unproductive and circular. We are all human. We can all do better. We can also forgive mistakes. We don’t need to cancel or publicly shame each other. We can disagree, and still be friends. We can change our minds.
I think what matters most is that we continue talking about these things. Without a conversation, change does not happen. Change is good. Change is exciting. Change is necessary.
— K. JO
